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baka_chibi_puffs
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Name: Micaela
Country: United States
State: California
Metro: Bakersfield
Birthday: 9/5/1990
Gender: Female
Interests: Anime and Manga, reading, writing, drawing, laughing, listening to music, being a baka, life in gene
Expertise: Being an idiot, reading stories, writing stories (sure, just let me think I'm good at it,k?) and var
Occupation: Student
Message: message me
AIM:  starstruck445
Yahoo:  Nazomi445
Member Since:
8/17/2004
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| Do you remember all those nights we stayed up talking until the sun was rising on your time zone?
Or all those evenings when I just couldn't stay awake any longer
and I fell asleep while texting you,
waiting for my parents to go to bed
so I could hear your voice over the phone
How did we go from that sort of desperate constant contact
To this?
It hurts.
To not see you
Not call you
Not hold you
Not be with you.
It hurts.
Thinking that I'm the only one
Knowing that you're better off than me
Feeling like I'm totally alone in this pain.
It hurts.
Wanting to be with you all the time.
Forcing myself not to call you.
Dreaming every night of you.
Faking smiles when I think on you.
Living through the countless reminders of you.
It hurts.
We made so many promises.
Promises I would have done anything to keep.
I guess they didn't mean anything to you.
After hearing your voice I always feel so much better
whole.
Even if hearing you only makes me feel more sure of why this ended,
it still heals me somehow.
I need to hear you tonight.
Please...
please answer me when I call.
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| I just miss you so much.
I'm so tired...
Of pretending to be happy
Of feeling so sad all the time
Sad and empty
Like each time I smile I'm hollowing myself out a bit more.
The worst part is I don't want to get better
I don't want to move on, if moving on means moving farther from you.
Too bad you really don't care.
I Want to Know Your Plans--Say Anything
I want to know your plans and how involved in them I am.
When I go to sleep for good will I be forgiven?
And If you want roses you can go buy a bouquet.
If that just won't cut it, well what can I say?
You're what keeps me believing the world's not gone dead,
Strength in my bones put the words in my head.
When they pour out to paper, it's all for you.
'Cause that's what you do. That's what you do.
I want to know your fears, from your feet to the back of your ears.
When they raise the landing gear will your heart stay here?
If you could forgive me for being so brash, well you...
you could hit me or whip me, I'd savor each lash.
You're what keeps me believing the world's not gone dead,
Strength in my bones put the words in my head.
When they pour out to paper, it's all for you.
'Cause that's what you do.
No more fighting.
This is only a waste of our time
'cause soon we'll be leaving.
Will this strength still be mine?
I'll look out for you 'til I die, 'til I rot.
I'll remember you 'til I die, until I rot.
You're what keeps me believing the world's not gone dead,
Strength in my bones put the words in my head.
When they pour out to paper, it's all for you.
You're what keeps me believing the world's not gone dead,
Strength in my bones put the words in my head.
When they pour out to paper, it's all for you.
'Cause that's what you do. | | |
| I have heard it say
that dreams are merely for dreaming
that in this life
we can not hope to hold
the desires of our hearts
but honestly,
I did
when I held you.
Now what is this?
Some sort of parallel universe?
The Twilight Zone invading my
sacred corner of the universe?
How did we get this way?
So far apart and always
Alone.
The worst part is knowing.
Knowing you don't know
Knowing you wouldn't care
Knowing you don't hurt
like I do.
How am I supposed to face
this long drawn out existence
knowing?
Knowing that you were it.
Knowing that you were perfect.
Knowing that those promises
so real to me
now mean
nothing.
Sometimes I just want to leave
Run. Fast.
Wind
Clouds
Sky
all
flying
by.
then maybe i could pretend
that it was me leaving you
instead of you leaving me
Alone. | | |
| This is ridiculous. RIDICULOUS!
I ditch so many precious hours of novel writing for what?!
A grandmother calling me a boy and treating me like a servant and an ex boyfriend who completely twisted my heartstrings enough to make me practically yelp in pain. T_T
Today sucks...
Except for Yume! <3
Thank you for the comment. I know, I never see you and that is my fault as well u_u I hope your day went better than mine. =3 | | |
| Okay. I hate guys. Hate hate hate hateeeeee
....
Okay. Not hate.
*sigh*
Its just so frustrating. Harboring feelings for someone SUCKS. *growl*
Especially when they're like a flirting whore. =/ And want attention more than anything else. Honestly. And you thought they were going to be a good friend so you told them stuff and then they lose interest and meander off to their legion of adoring fans.
But, other than the guys I like, guy friends are usually much cooler than girl ones. *laughs* I mean, a lot of my "friends" that are girls kind of suck. What with their drama and getting pissed off and using me just until their problems blow over and then leaving me high and dry. Or just prying to get the juiciest drama. It really pisses me off.
Just like they boys though, there are exceptions.
Kristen is pretty freakin great. She actually cares and wants to hang out with me for no other reason than to just hang. And Yume is really nice, despite the fact that I don't talk to her as much as I'd like ;_; Manda rocks too. Even though she is dating my brother. And Kat, though I feel we've grown apart.
Gahh.
I'm going to go write my novel now. I just really needed to let off some steam. | | |
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